I hear so frequently from clients concerns of inadequacy – typically under the umbrella of relationships – as friends, siblings, students, employees, romantic partners, parents, etc.  And while there are often other adults or kiddos accompanying this narrative, some who influence our beliefs about self-competency, I also like to explore with folks one of the most current and significant manipulators of self-esteem:  The Internet.

The Internet has a strong influence in modern times on our esteem, extracurricular goals, brain-health, nutritional-health, and so on. ‘Dr. Google’ has certainly brought up several issues for me in the middle of an angst, worry, or frustration.  1)  It’s consistently available at my fingertips via my cell phone, 2)  “The Search is Real;” pandering can happen at any time of day or night when contemplating an inquiry (rationally-sparked or not).

Of course, there is more to the story than calling out the world-wide-web as the only entity to “blame” for seeking existential life answers or medical conditions.  Besides, modern-day technology has its perks, too.  Think of all the late-night scrolling that helps you stay awake while nursing your baby.  The online music platforms that you blast when studying for your final exams.  The social groups we join in support of shared experiences. Or the sheer amount of content available to research – which, on a flat screen is far more accessible than lugging out the Britannica from your parent’s basement.

And yet, despite its endless pages of information, know this: The Internet is scarce in its validity of self-worth.

Parental, spousal, occupational, educational, financial.  Under what terms are we identifying ourselves, and against what measuring stick?  How do we fall victim to the belief that overextending ourselves is the ‘new normal?’ In which areas can we recognize that GOOD ENOUGH is actually really great?

With hand over heart, and space for breath, I encourage us all to take on the challenge of our “Good Enough Duty.”

“Good Enough Duty” Decree:

• I will uphold self-compassion & exploration of how I contribute in my given role(s).
• I will remember to first uphold self-kindness if in doubt, and seek the support of those I trust, rather than simply rely on 2-Dimensional articles or flashy memes.
• I will work on continuing practices of reflection, gratitude, and non-judgment for myself and for others.
• I will recognize that life provides countless opportunities to try and better myself in words and actions.
• I will hold this kind of space and reverence with my kids, my partner, my family, my friends, my colleagues.
• I will honor the times I need to surrender to a hearty cry and necessary rest.

You. Are. ENOUGH.
And anything or anyone suggesting otherwise is not worth your time. <3