“Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts.”

Mark Twain

I traveled overseas recently. To India! From my ‘neck of the woods’ that is quite actually halfway around the globe. My main goal was to unplug, followed closely by holding myself accountable in one key aspect while abroad: to cultivate a practice of feeling small in the world.

Stateside, I find this kind of smallness frequently in the wilderness. Woods. Oceans. Meadows. This is not new, nor unique to me, as many would describe their own interconnectedness to Mama Earth; “in every walk with Nature one receives far more than he seeks” (John Muir). Planted in a scape of vast terrain at dusk, looking to the glimmer of stars revealing themselves, does this not highlight that anything earthly is simply humbling to experience? Have you found this, too?

“Small” regarding this post, pertains to a sense of awe or auspiciousness. An awareness of other perspectives — of what and who else exists on this planet. Of other people and landscapes. I feel small locally, too, as I can take myself into Philadelphia neighborhoods which each instill a unique cultural tradition, cuisine, or language. Whenever I take myself outdoors and off the concrete, I feel embraced by a spiritual ‘unknowingness’ that resonates larger than myself. This to me, is feeling small.

Now, I observe that this view does well expose my privilege as a cis-gender, white, Northeastern-raised, middle-class American. Of course it’s easier for me to feel safely small in these kinds of places and experiences. I am a person who is able to move about in any neighborhood and consume the variety because there is no other determined threat exhibited by my existence. Not while walking down city streets or along trails of the Wissahickon am I monitored or in question for being there. I am not marginalized.

Thus to be in India as a privileged person, steeped in the honor of attending a friend’s wedding, and immersing into the culture of family & friends who performed such a special matrimonial celebration (over several days and nights), the kaleidoscope of this “small” feeling felt magnified. The ranges of emotions! The mental & energetic unpacking that continues two weeks out from my return home.

Writing felt like an apt way to tease out some of it. And it honestly wasn’t until I began this post that I recognized my “feeling small” is still equipped by my privilege. What a block I have to it, sometimes. The means I had to travel around and explore submergence is notable and not taken for granted. How so many millions live, far differently than I do, witnessed throughout my time there. How so many eat. How so many work. Educate. Are educated.

I’d also say this: the yoga that I experienced there was 99% off of my mat. There was one night in a hotel room after arriving to Udaipur, that I moved into some physical forms and worked a little pranayama (breath practice). But the overarching “small feeling?” Its presence, at times overt and other times nuanced? That was the yoga. That was the travel. The long plane rides and lengthier layovers. The interpersonal interactions and stupefied, transformative embrace of the fluctuating Yamas (restraints) & Niyamas (duties). In particular to me, observations to nonattachment and nongreed (Aparigraha), and the surrendering and offering up to an omnipotent, higher consciousness (Isvara Pranidhana).

Thank you, India, for your patience. Thank you, family, for yours.
Thank you to the travel that expanded my mind and centered my spirit.